Three girls gathering their thoughts and reflections on love, romantic encounters and current explorations.
I’ve always been a hopeless romantic. No matter how many times I’ve been let down by the people I love, I believe that everyone is destined to meet someone whom they could share their lives with. Though I have faith in this, I’m not as careless about it as I was when I was younger. After so many failed relationships, I couldn’t help but steer clear from the dangerous world of dating and fake romances. I thought that all I needed was myself and eventually the right guy will come. But I have this nagging feeling that Prince Charming got stuck on a tree somewhere and I should probably go save him now before he starves to death. Only problem is that there seems to be a lot of princes stuck on trees. Let’s see where my adventure takes me and if it leads me to the right prince.
I’ve never really been in a safe or healthy relationship. I’ve been in love, I’ve been abused, I’ve been in lust, I’ve felt strongly about people, but I have a history of self sabotage. Now I find myself in a relationship with X, where I don’t really feel anything yet, but I know he loves me and cares about me, and will treat me the way I deserve to be treated. He’s a good man, he’s everything I have been looking for in a partner, but he’s not who I need him to be. No. He’s not M.
I can definitely identify a lot with Starshine in terms of past relationships, but I guess growing up in a different culture, I just learned to react differently. I learned a long time ago that monogamy wasn’t a lifestyle that was true to myself, even if I didn’t really know what I was seeking. I’m finally in a place where my polyamorous ideals are not compromised for the sake of a loving relationship, but I have comedicly bad luck in terms of choosing partners. Maybe I intentionally choose those who are unavailable to me to justify my wanderlust? But lately all I’ve been seeking is an anchor or 3 of my own.